As I left for this trip I was really distracted from Christ and the cross. As I tried to refocus myself on it, my mind would keep wandering. I was staring out the window of the airplane and at one point we were low before landing and I could see neighborhoods of individual houses with their cars parked out front. I thought of individual people in all these houses, all of them consumed with the importance of their own thoughts and lives. Their cars all out in front of their houses. Countless possessions decorating them inside. And yet so many of these spread over the landscape that lay before me. It was like seeing the earth as it really is for the first time. One question came to my mind.
Am I just going to be another person consumed with himself?
I know that I am. And Lord, you know that I am. But I don't want to be!
This trip has been good because overall it is having the effect of being able to look down on my life back home objectively. I can see it laid out before me on a landscape where trivialities get lost in the whole story that is taking place. As a result, God so graciously is speaking clarity and peace where before I only felt confusion and unrest. It almost felt supernatural as I read about the cross, listened to music about the cross, and meditated on how it applied to my present situation. What I thought was immovable had been moved by the power of the Gospel. My faith is now increased that when I am in such a situation again that the power of the Gospel will conquer whatever is distracting me.
Lord, help me believe in the power of your Gospel! Help me believe that you will always be faithful to conquer my daily distractions!
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Monday, March 12, 2007
Sunday Thoughts
"When thine eye is single, thy whole body is full of light."
Luke 11:34
How true are these words and how readily they are experienced. I was really distracted recently and this verse came alive in my mind. I began to apply it, making my eye single towards God, and felt the light of Christ flooding my thoughts and leaving me wondering how could I ever want to gaze on anything else. As I was worshipping today I had an image of an eye fixed on God in singleness and as light flooded into the eye, it began lighting up so many beautiful things. What a beautiful image of the truth that it is not our job to light up the dark and unknown places in our lives. Our only duty is to keep our eyes fixed on God and He will do the work of lighting up our lives.
Brett was talking in his message Sunday about the High Priest going in to the temple once a year to atone for people's sins and the fact that God tore the curtain top to bottom means that when can approach whenever we want! As I thought about this though, I realized that the problem is that I begin taking it for granted. After becoming accustomed to approaching God's presence, I find myself not feeling the weight of what I'm doing. I begin walking into His presence with eyes that wander instead of those that are fixed with reverence on the lasting beauty of my Savior.
There is so much beauty out there that captivates me! What is so precious about Christ's beauty is that it is lasting. One of the verses from the message today that came alive to me was from Hebrews 10:34.
"...you joyfully accepted the plundering of your property, since you knew that you yourselves had a better possession and an abiding one."
An abiding possession. There are so many possessions, material and sometimes even friends, that I clasp to tightly to my chest. In Christ though, I have a possession that I can clasp as tightly as I want and never let go! Then I can look at all the beauty in the world and all its possessions and say with the hymn writer, Jesus is fairer! Jesus is purer! Who makes the woeful heart to sing!
Lord, keep my eyes fixed on you. Let me never relax my embrace from you as my abiding possession. Thou, my soul's glory, joy, and crown.
Luke 11:34
How true are these words and how readily they are experienced. I was really distracted recently and this verse came alive in my mind. I began to apply it, making my eye single towards God, and felt the light of Christ flooding my thoughts and leaving me wondering how could I ever want to gaze on anything else. As I was worshipping today I had an image of an eye fixed on God in singleness and as light flooded into the eye, it began lighting up so many beautiful things. What a beautiful image of the truth that it is not our job to light up the dark and unknown places in our lives. Our only duty is to keep our eyes fixed on God and He will do the work of lighting up our lives.
Brett was talking in his message Sunday about the High Priest going in to the temple once a year to atone for people's sins and the fact that God tore the curtain top to bottom means that when can approach whenever we want! As I thought about this though, I realized that the problem is that I begin taking it for granted. After becoming accustomed to approaching God's presence, I find myself not feeling the weight of what I'm doing. I begin walking into His presence with eyes that wander instead of those that are fixed with reverence on the lasting beauty of my Savior.
There is so much beauty out there that captivates me! What is so precious about Christ's beauty is that it is lasting. One of the verses from the message today that came alive to me was from Hebrews 10:34.
"...you joyfully accepted the plundering of your property, since you knew that you yourselves had a better possession and an abiding one."
An abiding possession. There are so many possessions, material and sometimes even friends, that I clasp to tightly to my chest. In Christ though, I have a possession that I can clasp as tightly as I want and never let go! Then I can look at all the beauty in the world and all its possessions and say with the hymn writer, Jesus is fairer! Jesus is purer! Who makes the woeful heart to sing!
Lord, keep my eyes fixed on you. Let me never relax my embrace from you as my abiding possession. Thou, my soul's glory, joy, and crown.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Imagining Myself in the Future
I've been listening to some chill music today and something about it is making me have these very peaceful imaginings of the future. Like I imagine myself on the day when I walk off this ship for the last time. I already can imagine some of the thoughts I will be having then. Thoughts maybe of wishing I had done things differently or that I had been more faithful. I don't think these thoughts will the most powerful in my mind though. The most overwhelming thoughts will be those of thankfulness. I have been on my ship for less than a year and already I am so thankful for all that God has done and is doing. Every day I wonder how someone like me is on a ship doing the things that I'm doing. I would not have chosen this for myself and yet every day I am amazed by fresh grace that flows from heaven.
It's so crazy to imagine the future because the possibilities are endless, so endless, but oh what a thought that God's faithfulness will be there no matter what happens! Truly he is an anchor for our souls and is the only place where we can find rest.
Surely goodness and mercy will follow me
all the days of my life!
It's so crazy to imagine the future because the possibilities are endless, so endless, but oh what a thought that God's faithfulness will be there no matter what happens! Truly he is an anchor for our souls and is the only place where we can find rest.
Surely goodness and mercy will follow me
all the days of my life!
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
A Day in a Coffee Shop
The majority of the day has been spent in this small coffee shop in Galveston. The environment is relaxing to say the least. It feels almost like time is standing still and I am looking back at the patchy landscape of my life. I don't mind the smell of cigarette smoke. Ceiling fans move hypnotically, making shadows flash across the tables and walls. The music is mostly melancholy, washing away the busy thoughts that have accumulated in my mind. I read here all morning and wrote emails, sipping coffee and floating effortlessly in my mind. I'm back here in the late afternoon and have been listening to music and writing in my journal.
I read beautiful, encouraging, and truth-filled words from Andrew Murray this morning about surrendering to God and letting Him do the work of establishing us in Christ. He pointed out that all our efforts just get in the way when God promises do this work Himself. My focus now becomes more one of not getting distracted, surrendering, and releasing my heart into His promising and loving hands.
Crazy that I should have forgotten the countless times Jesus asked me to lay my burdens down. As I wake each morning, the picture of myself is like a traveller who wakes up from sleep and immediately looks around to gather his things so he can continue his long and tiresome journey. A new image is coming alive in my mind right now and it is of someone who wakes up and immediately his eyes fall on the familiar gaze of His Savior. He then gathers his things and gives them up to the offering Hand and suddenly they all disappear. He feels the Savior take his hand and this Hand leads him through the day, guiding through suffering and joys alike. Suffering and joy are one and the same in light of the the ever-present Savior living from within his own heart.
"And it is God who establishes us with you in Christ, and has anointed us, and who has also put his seal on us and given us his Spirit as a guarantee."
2 Corinthians 1:21
I read beautiful, encouraging, and truth-filled words from Andrew Murray this morning about surrendering to God and letting Him do the work of establishing us in Christ. He pointed out that all our efforts just get in the way when God promises do this work Himself. My focus now becomes more one of not getting distracted, surrendering, and releasing my heart into His promising and loving hands.
Crazy that I should have forgotten the countless times Jesus asked me to lay my burdens down. As I wake each morning, the picture of myself is like a traveller who wakes up from sleep and immediately looks around to gather his things so he can continue his long and tiresome journey. A new image is coming alive in my mind right now and it is of someone who wakes up and immediately his eyes fall on the familiar gaze of His Savior. He then gathers his things and gives them up to the offering Hand and suddenly they all disappear. He feels the Savior take his hand and this Hand leads him through the day, guiding through suffering and joys alike. Suffering and joy are one and the same in light of the the ever-present Savior living from within his own heart.
"And it is God who establishes us with you in Christ, and has anointed us, and who has also put his seal on us and given us his Spirit as a guarantee."
2 Corinthians 1:21
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Riding the Bus in the Morning
I just had wonderful memory as I was standing outside on the ship this morning of riding the bus to school when I was little. On mornings in the spring, riding the bus was especially refreshing. There would always be atleast a few windows cracked open and fresh spring air would be lightly circulating throughout the bus. Sometimes I would have a book that I was into and it was so wonderful to be wrapped up in a story as the familiar scene passed by outside.
School would pass by as well with all its presumed importance as I would steal brief minutes in my book. While the morning busride would have more of a peaceful, melancholy sweetness, the afternoon busride was happier and full of anticipation as I look forward to more time reading, playing outside, and of course, eating a good afterschool snack with some kool-aid. Now that is a memory that makes me smile:)
School would pass by as well with all its presumed importance as I would steal brief minutes in my book. While the morning busride would have more of a peaceful, melancholy sweetness, the afternoon busride was happier and full of anticipation as I look forward to more time reading, playing outside, and of course, eating a good afterschool snack with some kool-aid. Now that is a memory that makes me smile:)
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
A Rising Sun
In just a short while I will standing in heaven looking back on my life. Or I wonder if my eyes will be so utterly captivated by the beauty of Jesus Christ that I will not have any desire to look back. Such a thought confronts my heart in many ways. The first thought is one of comfort because the things that frighten me are all the sudden of little consequence. There is also a feeling of reservation though because there are certain things in my life that I am looking forward to such as getting married and seeing what my kids are going to be like. I find then that my thoughts of heaven also make getting married seem to be of little consequence. And the truth is that my dreams of happiness on this earth really are trivial when they stand next to the light of the beauty of Christ. All of this is still setting in but it is gradually dawning on me that I am going to have to let go of such worldly cares as marriage and kids if I am going to experience the joy of being captivated completely by Christ. To be honest, there are two things in my life right now that consume much of my thoughts. One of them is that I will be spending 7 of the next 8 months underway on my ship. The other thought is one of looking forward to getting married. A thought of anxiety and a thought of longing and joy. The beauty of Christ is like a sun rising over the horizon and its light is falling on both of these worries and transforming both of them into vehicles that have the simple purpose of bringing me closer to Christ.
And so I rejoice.
I rejoice at going underway for 7 months because I know without a doubt that such a time will make me fall more in love with my Savior. I rejoice as I look forward to getting married for the reason that this also will also bring me closer to Christ. As my heart conforms with this view, I am finding that my departure is not a cause for sorrow and neither is getting married merely a cause for temporal happiness. All sorrow and temporal happiness dissipate as my hearts' doors open to the light of Christ.
Give me one pure and holy passion
give me one magnificent obsession
give me one glorious ambition for my life
to know and follow hard after you
To know and follow hard after you
to grow as your disciple in your truth
This world is empty pale and poor
compared to knowing you my Lord
Lead me on and I will run after You:)
And so I rejoice.
I rejoice at going underway for 7 months because I know without a doubt that such a time will make me fall more in love with my Savior. I rejoice as I look forward to getting married for the reason that this also will also bring me closer to Christ. As my heart conforms with this view, I am finding that my departure is not a cause for sorrow and neither is getting married merely a cause for temporal happiness. All sorrow and temporal happiness dissipate as my hearts' doors open to the light of Christ.
Give me one pure and holy passion
give me one magnificent obsession
give me one glorious ambition for my life
to know and follow hard after you
To know and follow hard after you
to grow as your disciple in your truth
This world is empty pale and poor
compared to knowing you my Lord
Lead me on and I will run after You:)
Friday, December 22, 2006
Rose of Bethlehem
There’s a Rose in Bethlehem
Colored red like mercy’s blood
Tis the flower of our faith
Tis the blossom of God’s love
Though its bloom is fresh with youth
Surely what will be He knows
For a tear of morning dew
Is rolling down the Rose
Oh, Rose of Bethlehem
How lovely, pure and sweet
Born to glorify the Father
Born to wear the thorns for me
This song is just beautiful. I have been listening to it over and over again in the past couple of days. It is probably my favorite Christmas song ever. Last time I journaled here about Chrismas I talked about how I was trying not to be selfish around Christmas time. It is so much work not to just join in everyone else's attitude around Christmas time as far just being caught up in it all and not slowing down to remember. Remember Christ's words, "Do this in remembrance of me." Let this be our thought as we celebrate Christmas, as we love and serve people, as we give of ourselves and what is precious to us just like God did in giving us Himself wrapped in flesh. The things of this world will not last. Our glory will not last. God will last forever and his glory will remain long after the glory of this world has faded.
Oh, Rose of Bethlehem. You are lovely. You are pure. You are sweet. Make us like you.
Colored red like mercy’s blood
Tis the flower of our faith
Tis the blossom of God’s love
Though its bloom is fresh with youth
Surely what will be He knows
For a tear of morning dew
Is rolling down the Rose
Oh, Rose of Bethlehem
How lovely, pure and sweet
Born to glorify the Father
Born to wear the thorns for me
This song is just beautiful. I have been listening to it over and over again in the past couple of days. It is probably my favorite Christmas song ever. Last time I journaled here about Chrismas I talked about how I was trying not to be selfish around Christmas time. It is so much work not to just join in everyone else's attitude around Christmas time as far just being caught up in it all and not slowing down to remember. Remember Christ's words, "Do this in remembrance of me." Let this be our thought as we celebrate Christmas, as we love and serve people, as we give of ourselves and what is precious to us just like God did in giving us Himself wrapped in flesh. The things of this world will not last. Our glory will not last. God will last forever and his glory will remain long after the glory of this world has faded.
Oh, Rose of Bethlehem. You are lovely. You are pure. You are sweet. Make us like you.
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